I’m sitting on my porch swing right now taking in the glorious evening. Light breeze, temps in the low 70s, no mosquitos.
Let me put this another way: today was the warmest it’s been since sometime in September of last year.
We deserve this evening in Minnesota.
But I’m really not here to talk about the weather — although let’s be honest, I’m really good at doing that. It’s the mark of a born-and-raised Minnesota farm girl.
Weather can be everything.
And oh look! I count three bunnies frolicking in my yard with not a care in the world. (See also Sunday’s blog post: new fences put up to create “Rabbit Fortresses” around my veggie gardens.)
Oh shoot. I digress again.
So this week I’ve been in this weird, sort of thoughtful place. Work has been crazy — I mean, total sheer insanity with regard to the multitude of issues and projects coming at all of us in the office. I feel like all of I’ve done is switch between items on my to-do list every 10 minutes, which can’t be good for my brain.
It makes my head hurt and I dislike not having the time to think creatively and simply slow down just a little to make sure the work I’m doing matters.
What I’ve found lately, too, is that the crazier work is at the office, the less I want to go home and try to ‘catch up’ on said work at night. My brain is done, finished, toast. I’d rather do something that gives me joy — like get my gardens ready; cook dinner for my family; play piano; sit on my porch swing; write a blog post.
(Full disclosure: This doesn’t mean I don’t like my job. I LOVE what I do and I’m passionate about it. I think sometimes there is just SO MUCH that I want to get done in a short amount of time that it can get frustrating for me!)
I read an article today about how women can’t have it all — and how that’s 100% okay. And then I followed that up, while out for a walk tonight, with The Rise podcast by Rachel Hollis about how women need to be better about asking for help. (Side note – I’m not even a big Rachel Hollis fan but sometimes her podcasts just suck me in.)
Anyway, none of what I read/heard was a surprise to me. Although I am certainly an over achiever when it comes to doing all the things. I will admit that.
I mean, I’ve had a career for 27+ years, I’ve been married for almost 20 years, and have answered to “Mom” for over 15. Some days I’m kick ass at my career and other days I feel like I’m the best mom ever.
And then there are moments like tonight, when I finally remembered to pick up Joe’s confirmation photo at church – which has been waiting for me since probably January. Oops.
This is also probably when (cue Rachel Hollis) I should’ve asked Teacher Man for help. (Hey honey, can you swing by church on your way home from work to pick up the confirmation photo?) Somehow, though, this photo pick-up became – at least in my mind – my mom responsibility and I didn’t want to bother him about it.
I know, weird. But that’s how I am sometimes.
Ah, I told you I was in a thoughtful mood this week. 😉
So all of this is to say I don’t really have any answers. I just wanted to write because – remember? … joy.
Yes, joy.
XOXO – Lara
